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While accountants are used to helping clients solve difficult problems, they're often less adept at resolving issues within their own firms. Reserved by nature, they tend to shy away from conflict and let situations fester. What they may not realize is the ability to resolve disagreements can be a great tool in developing their careers.

That was the message delivered by Sylvia Lane, of the California-based executive coaching firm Convergence Coaching, to the Celebrating Women CPAs conference in Los Angeles. "Conflict management," she said, can showcase leadership qualities, including patience, strong presentation skills and the ability to manage difficult situations and people.

Many people in business mistakenly believe that conflict is negative because it suggests they can't get along with colleagues, Lane told the conference, sponsored by the California Association of CPAs. In truth, conflict can be a catalyst for helpful changes. For example, settling competing viewpoints can stimulate innovation and boost morale, Lane said.

Lane's eight-step strategy for effective conflict management requires employees to address issues head-on, exchange ideas and present clear solutions. Too often, co-workers gloss over differences or try to move forward without working through the root problems. "What you want in the end is to get what you want," Lane said. "(But) you want a joint commitment."

To resolve conflicts, Lanes advises:

Define clearly the source of the conflict: It's important to acknowledge that a conflict exists and develop a strategy to resolve it. Lane says some people are reluctant to confront a problem.

From the start, make a firm commitment to resolve the issue: It can be difficult for people who disagree to understand each other's complaints or budge from their own long-held positions. In this context, Lane believes first meetings are crucial, since that's where you'll set the tone for future discussions.

If you're rushed or distracted, you may set yourself back. Lane suggests scheduling a time and place to discuss the issues. Such meetings should occur privately, so co-workers can air out their differences more freely. And don't try to settle things by e-mail, which can be misinterpreted and even make small situations big problems.

Present a solution: Outline your view of the conflict, Lane suggests, covering what caused the situation, how both sides share responsibility, and outlining the potential consequences if the situation isn't remedied. It's important to map out a few possible solutions, but  Lane says employees won't make progress unless they're willing to look at their own role in the conflict honestly.

Stop and listen: Especially when conflicts grow heated, co-workers may focus so much on making their points that they fail to understand fully the other side's position. That may cause them to miss details, Lane said, creating bad feelings that can prolong a conflict.  "Stop and listen," she said. "Don't assume you know the other side's view or rationale."

Provide examples: If you're going to criticize, have examples to support your points. People respond better when someone can show them why something can be improved.

Ask for help: It's all in the approach. Criticize someone harshly and they're less likely to respond favorably. But treat a conflict as a group problem and ask for help coming up with a solution, and you're more likely to find common ground. 

Follow through: Lane suggests it may even be helpful to put an understanding in writing.

Above all, don't let emotions run too hot. Fits of temper won't fix a problem, Lane notes. Cool analysis and a pleasant manner will work much better. "Don't let people go off in a huff without a recommitment to solve the conflict," she says.

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